I have a story to tell, in fact more but similar stories, and a question to ask at the end of each story.
There was a 10 years old kid. He used to fly kites awesomely. The last festive season, he had defeated even grown ups in the challenge. He would cut everyone else’s kite’s thread with his flying kite charmingly. He had been a champion for the past three years, with his skill getting better every year. He had received awards and accolades in his colony functions for this feat. His parents were extremely proud of his achievements. But this year something sad happened. This time, while trying to snip a distant kite, his leg slipped and he fell down. He fell 15 floors beneath the terrace. His parents immediately took him to hospital, but before he could be cured, he was declared brought dead.
Do you file a case of culpable homicide(causing death by negligence) and Juvenile Justice Act [cruelty against minors], against the child’s parents? - Yes the parents knew that it is risky, but that is something that most of the humans in the colony do on that festival - fly kites.
Were they not scared? - they might be, but they knew that their kid had been a champion.
Did they make him to fly kites for their popularity or that award money? - Definitely not, it was the child’s passion, his dream, it eventually gave them popularity, but he wasn’t forced.
Were his parents cruel? Of course not.
After his death people still remember him for his abilities and skills, some even say, that he died doing what he liked the most and he achieved so much and that too at a very young age and celebrated his sad demise by titling him “the kite boy".
Should they celebrate? Its a matter of perception.
But still does it make his parents responsible for his death?
Or consider another story, a young lad 13 years old, from an army background. Mom worked as a doctor in army, dad had fought many battles, his uncles, aunts, this, that, every relation he has had, served the country, protected the people of the nation. All he hears, and he wants is protecting the nation, serving the country, defeating the enemies. Once he grows up he aims to join army. For this he is practicing hard. He is going for workouts. He is definitely young for it, but he has that stamina, he had been able to do those military level workouts, in fact those which even grown ups find hard to do. All he aims is defeating the enemies one day. Now one day while sleeping he felt his heart heavy, he collapsed and died even before he could see a doctor.
Do you file culpable homicide against his parents for allowing him to work out? Did they not know, that working out at such a young age could be serious. Did they not stop him. For all you know, they might have tried but seeing the kid’s determination, they would have hushed. Do we celebrate his death? Its a question whether you see his death as death of a kid, or a martyr, who was trying to do something for the country.
Do you file culpable homicide against those parents whose kids participate in under 12, under 14 cricket championships but die due to cricket injuries?
The sad and tragic death of Aradhana after fasting for 68 days was a similar case. It shook everyone but the strong reactions that it is receiving from media, from “so-called-activists”, from netizens, and the charges that have been filed over the parents of the kid is equally nerve-wracking.
Now, people from army families would understand the story of the army kid, the people who had seen child prodigies, and know their success stories, would relate to the kite boy, the people who have someone in their family desperately wanting to be a cricketer, would understand the cricket story, and people who have seen kids fasting (not with an opinion of “they should not” but with amazement, and a thought that when I as a grown up could not how could they?) would understand, that Aradhana was not forced. She had done whatever she had wanted to do, with an aim in mind. She did succeed as well. But later whatever happened is sad.
Now please leave the girl’s parents who already may be in plight due to loss of their daughter and stop alleging those hurtful sins on them.
But the fact is "WE JUST WON'T. WE FIND OUR SHARE OF QUESTIONS. WE RELATE ALL THIS TO OUR PRINCIPLES OF ATHEISM, OR OUR AIM OF HAVING TRP'S OR OUR AIM OF ERADICATING CHILD ABUSE OR OUR HABIT OF PUTTING NOSE INTO EVERYTHING BUT NEWS AND THEN WE WILL HAVE OUR OWN STORIES AROUND IT"
So I have my own share of answers and agreements for you.
"The entire nation should be ashamed that such a practice still exists. Her father's guru advised the family that if she fasted for 68 days, his business would be profitable," activist XXX told BBC Hindi. I doubt this statement. Who would go and tell this to Mr. XXX? The father of the girl, or the guru? Definitely neither of them. How does he know it then. On what ground is he alleging this? To put my opinion, no Jain guru would ever say to fast for “profitability of business”. Almost all Jain fasts are away from materialistic benefits. In fact if you see through it, Jainism in itself is an atheist religion. It does not believe in God giving you anything materialistic if you pray/sacrifice to/for him.
They ask, she was a minor, how could she voluntarily wish and was allowed to fast. But I think it is exactly similar to those kids who join coaching for IIT’s when they are in their teens. They have their aim in mind, and while you worry for their health, they only care about their aim.
Not only teenagers, many grown-ups, old people I have seen, their health keeps deteriorating but they won’t stop fasting. I sometimes feel they should look at their bodies once. Yes they are not minors, they can take their decisions, while the family members keep saying them to stop, but they won’t. They have this determination. You can call them fanatic, if you call a mountaineer fanatic, because despite his bad health, he wants to climb that one more milestone he thinks he would be able to and eventually does, all because of the determination, and if he fails, his act is not hailed as a suicide.
She was glorified as “Bal Tapaswi”, and glorifications of this kind have always happened in the past in the Jain community. It is actually a big deal to exercise control on one’s senses, that too a kid, unmoved by chocolates and all the junk we eat, needs immense determination.
NDTV news reads, "Critics say glorifying Aradhana's death could condition youngsters into believing hers was a path worth emulating". This is still a rational logic to fall for, and if we want such sad tragedies to not happen again we should stop people from glorifying her death.
Some activists also claimed, why were her blood pressures and other reports not checked while she was fasting, and hence her parents are alleged for negligence. But the girl had fasted the previous year as well, and an year before that, not 68 days though but those were still considerable days. And believe me, this had been happening across all fasts that the community exercises. We never monitor these sorts of reports. Something shocking like this never happened. “Negligence” and “Ignorance” are not the same. Now that it happened, and with all this furore, I’m sure, people would be more conscious of it, because no matter what a naive person thinks of this religion, it does value life to every atom of it.
This also re-opened the discussion on Jain practice of Santhara (which is fasting till death). People just need a topic for debate, it seems. This girl did not at all sit for santhara. She did complete her fast, had paarna, and its two days after her paarna that she succumbed to death. So it has got nothing to do with that practice.
To all the activists probing the case out there, this is not child abuse, Sirs and Madams. Don’t stop probing, but there are numerous cases of child abuse which we need to look out for. Sexual abuse, domestic abuse, drunk dad’s abuse, discriminatory abuse, child labour et cetera, and you see all this et ceteras needs your attention as well before someone dies and someone reports death. Moreover parents, who see their kids smoking, drinking, or sticking to the mobile phones all the time but don't stop them and sometimes join them in the fun, please file a case on them for negligence. In the long run their kids are also gonna suffer.
To all the netizens who are shocked because a girl died after fasting but know nothing except this one sentence, please get to the root before you click that share button, or comment on this as a fanatic act.
P.S. I’m not supporting excessive fasting in this post. Nor am I pointing fingers at anyone. But let the police probe, let the soul of the girl rest in peace, let others learn to think before they take up excessive fasting, let her parents cry for their daughter, but don’t allege them for her death, it hurts when you are called the murderer of your own son or daughter, and lets just not blame the religion or the whole community for something you know nothing of.
